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Sex Sells... or doesn't » Female athletes are not bimbos

Girls rule. Can't live without ‘em. And advertisers want to make sure we don't forget this. Because if we forget this, we won't buy enough of their products. We all love sex, so why not beat into our heads that spending money is synonymous with sex. Scary, eh?

Girls have always played a role in skateboarding and it's advertising whether anyone wants to acknowledge it or not. From the All Girls Skate Jam to the International Girls Skateboarding Association, girls are moving up in the athletic world of skateboarding - and they should. They used to just be pretty, now they're making a bold statement through contests, killer sk8 photos and a lot of interest from magazines like SG Surf.Skate.Snow, Foam, several surf mags and a myriad of online zines.

But is that what corporate America wants? Or is this a facade for what advertising execs want to see?

Women in extreme sports are tearing it up just as much as the guys and I'd bet that scares a lot of insecure marketing strategists and advertising executives. Think of it this way - These guys used to rely on girls to simply look pretty and stand next to their products to get sophomoric males to drool over the girls and hence the advertised products. Now these same women are launching through the air on snowboards, grinding pools and telling these corporate dorks to piss-off!

Gold Wheels

Still the advertising folks don't let up. They know that sex still sells as evidenced in recent adds from Gold Wheels. Gold Wheels Ad The wheels them selves are kind of funny and I suppose the ad had its moments... The print version had the girl's crotch covered with a blurb instructing us to go to their web site for the un-censored version (not much of a thrill). I wonder if this really sells more product or not.

Perhaps it simply has good slut-appeal. One has to wonder if any female riders would ride for a company that sluts-up its adds. It certainly got my attention, but I still have not purchased a set of Gold Wheels. Oh well.

Hubba Wheels

Hubba Wheels have a similarly aggressive attitude toward putting women in suggestive poses for their ads. Their classic ( and my personal favorite) is the nipple-cover-up ad. Hubba Wheels Ad If one were to incorporate breasts and skateboard wheels, I have to admit this is the obvious way to do it, but it seems as though good taste was left by the wayside. I still haven't figured out if it makes me want to skate or masturbate more. Kind of a toss up, pardoning the pun. Seems as though there's a little bit of Larry Flint inspiration in these adds.

Doesn't anyone just want a cool girlfriend that will either hang by or ride with you? I'm sure there's at least a meager few of you out there!

Here are a few more of Hubba's provocative advertisements:

Hubba Wheels Ad Hubba Wheels Ad

Maverick Skateboards

The folks at maverick take a much more rock & roll approach to the girls in their ads - they sort of remind me of '80s hairbands. The&38217;re not quite as overtly sexual, but they certainly have tweaked the "sex sells" concept.

I'll be honest, if my skateboard sex fantasy were to come to fruition, it would be damn close to this. So, I sort of have to give a nod of approval to the Maverick campaign in some fashion. for a while they were running two-page centerfolds in Resolve Skate Mag (a free, in-shop, East Coast mag) that were quite the collector's items.

But again I have to ask, how many girls are on the Maverick skate team? Their models may be down with skate culture, fashion and attitude, but I get the impression they don't ride the skate parks too often.

But its not all eye-candy... Their site has an advice column that offers plenty of death threats to punks who don't treat their girls right. But maybe its a compensation ploy to assuage the titillating effect of their site and general image.

Maybe the Hollywood porn industry should jump on this bandwagon and offer us a true XXX feast of luscious skate products with a tagline like; "Don' Skate, Masturbate!"

More Maverick ads...

Maverick Skateboard Ad Maverick Skateboard Ad Maverick Skateboard Ad Maverick Skateboard Ad Maverick Skateboard Ad

Suicide Girls

Suicide Girl with Skateboard & a mohawk

Even the punk/goth babes of this clan couldn't pass up the opportunity to join the skate revolution. The Suicide Girls have their own line of skate decks (my wife bought me the signature board cause she's cool as hell!). The Suicide Girls even appear in the Foundation video, That's Life.

Bitch Bushings

Bitch Bushings logo

Even a product as mundane as bushing are using sex to sell. I wonder how many women go out of their way to buy Bitch Bushings?

Bitch Bushings ad Bitch Bushings ad Bitch Bushings ad

Underground Skateboards

Underground Skateboard tits

Now, that's what you'd call a BANNER!

Colorblind Skateboards

Colorblind's Scratch series fo decks

Scratch and sniff porn never caught on, but these decks are hysterical - especially the Sven Aerts "ear" one.

Just a Clothing Line

Then there are the companies that take a healthier approach to the "sex sells" notion by offering a girl's clothing line. Nothing says it can't be a little sexy, right?

Thrasher boy-cut shorts for girls

Thrasher Magazine has been selling a few girl's shirts and now offer the boy-shorts (pictured at left) that offer a perfect solution as to your girlfriend's next present - if she's into that sort of thing.

Slap Magazine Panties

Their sister publication, Slap Magazsine, has aptly placed their logo across the cheeks - in some circles, that's called excellent marketing and product placement.

Thrasher boy-cut shorts for girls

And here's the offering from Transworld:
The aptly named "Snow Angel" for those post snowboarding evenings when the fireplace and lust get too hot for conventional attire.

Dress by Dickies Girl

Dickies features a complete girl's line of clothing under the Dickies Girl name. They've long been renown for their one-piece dresses (shown at right) as well as tops and pants. There's something cool about the stiff coarse fabric they feature.

Many retailers are beginning to see the value of the "female dollar" and are expanding their lines to include girl's clothing and shoes.

What better way to get your girlfriend involved (or down with) your skating than outfitting her in clothes that actually fit her body. Don't forget there are plenty of female rippers out there tearing up the sk8 parks and many of them long for sk8 attire that is designed for the female form. Bulky guy-stuff doesn't cut it for most women. The market is slowly reacting and extending female lines, but it ultimately takes a LOT of women voicing their needs. If the retailers and manufacturers don't see profit, all voices will fall on deaf ears... as they say in some circles.

Skull Skates tank-top for girls

Skull Skates, one of the oldest and most recognized brands in skating, knows the value of keeping the ladies dressed in black with their infamous skull. They've even taken it to the beach!

Skull Skates Bikini
Juice Magazine - girls tank

The nice folks at juice Magazine prove they know girls wear different shaped clothing than guys. Juice is by far the biggest sk8 mag on the market. I have no idea how they can continually find enough content to pack their mag to it's fattest, but they do. And all the articles are in-depth and amazing. No filler here!

Skull Skates Bikini

Don't forget you don't have to sell a specific type of product to introduce sex to the marketing campaign. The execs at Shorty's know this and demonstrate it quite nicely with their 2006 Curb Wax ad.

From all this I conclude that:

  • Girls will continue to exceed as athletes.
  • Sex will always sell.
  • Mankind will always be horny.
  • And... I'll probably continue to have a hypocritical view of sex in advertising.

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